No Plan B

Ten years ago, I never thought I'd be where I am today. My plans were totally different. Since I was a little girl, I planned on getting married to a great guy (which I have), and having children by age 30. Four days ago I turned 30 years old. The whole month of September was the hardest transition I've ever had in my life. I spent half the month trying to hold on to these dreams and plans with the strongest grip, like I was holding on for dear life. I knew once that birthday hit, I had lost. Lost all my plans, my ideas, and getting my way. Turning 30 doesn't seem like such a big deal to most women. But most women I know have children by the time they hit that mile marker. Not me. I had no plan B. I put all my bets down on those plans I had made for myself. The only thing left to do was surrender.

It was a blessing that I didn't get to work much last month, because I needed that time with the Lord to sort out all my thoughts. Discouraged, disappointed and angry....yep that was me. I mean, I had set myself up for it the past 25 years. What did I expect? I then realized, this whole time I was placing all my confidence in my plans, and in my ways....not the Father's. God promised Abraham he would have a son. Years later God did what He promised. He knew how old Abraham and Sarah would be when they had their child. He wasn't worried. Society today tells us we have to do or obtain certain things by a certain age. If we don't, then it's too late and we're too old. Society's woman has a so-called biological clock. I have listened to that clock get louder as my twenties have passed me by. But I no longer listen to that. I listen to the voice of the Lord that says in Habakkuk 2:3 (I like the Amplified Bible version):

"For the vision is yet for an appointed time and it hastens to the end [fulfillment]; it will not deceive or disappoint. Though it tarry, wait [earnestly] for it, because it will surely come; it will not be behindhand on its appointed day."

I believe God wanted to use Abraham and Sarah to show them, and everyone else who reads it, that He always does what He says He will do, no matter how old you are. He wanted to be glorified in them. I believe He wants to do the same with me. I am super excited about the plans God has made for me, whatever they are. Can you imagine the blessing that will be there when the day comes that I will see His dreams and plans come to pass in my life? He will be glorified! I believe with my whole heart that my best years are yet to come. They have not passed me by! And neither has yours! We need to trust God at ALL times, even if our plans don't work out. There is no plan B. There's only God. If we put all our confidence in Him, then surely He will bring to pass all the plans He has for our lives. His timing is perfect, His ways are perfect, His plans are perfect. I am no longer anxious, but excited! And you should be too! There's nothing I want more than to see my Lord be glorified through me, no matter what I have to go through, or how long I have to wait. I am ready. I am willing. I am confident in HIM. Not myself. He is my plan A and my plan B. There's no other way. He has your desires, your dreams, and anything else your heart yearns for in the palm of His hand. The sooner we surrender our plans, the sooner He can bring about His plans. I'm so tired of hanging on to the things I have no control of. Tired of crying, tired of feeling sorry for myself, tired of being so self-consumed. I just want to be happy. And I finally am. Not because I have everything I've been dreaming of. But because I have the Lord. He brings a joyful song to my heart, and such a completeness that nothing else in this entire world could ever bring. I am thankful for the amazing foundation He has helped my husband and I build while we wait to start a family. Let's take time to look for the many blessings God gives us while we wait for His promises to come to pass.

Love,
Amanda B