My Healing Journey: Phase Two
Phase 1 was posted Jan. 30, 2010 Titled: Stopped Cold Like A Deer Caught In The Headlights
At that time He wanted All of me-All of the brokenness, All that I needed to be found in Him. He needed me to be still, cease striving and know that He is All His Word says He is. And Me, I was to do NOTHING!! Nothing but let Him be Daddy. To let Him be the potter and me the clay.
Lately there has been an extreme restlessness within me. I am so ready for the “Behold I make all things new." I feel that drive and need to break through a mountain and seize the change I deserve. As the New Year approaches my anticipation and expectancy is that of a child waiting for Christmas presents. Once again Daddy grabs my attention and slows me and my intentions down. Which leads me to phase 2?
While talking to a friend about wanting things to change in their life, I prayed that they would be “content in the wait”. Tell me, have you ever had your words come back at you.
Let the whining begin: OK Lord, I hear you. But I’ve been still, haven’t I? I’m doing nothing!! I am very restless, I am over it! And now you want me to wait longer and I have to like it!! Well I am not settling God!
The Lord Quickly spoke: "Contentment is not settling. Settling is compliancy. Contentment is 'peace and Joy in the Holy Spirit.' Rm: 14:17 I came to give you Life an abundant Life."
A few nights later I’m awaken to the word fortitude and later that same night I hear the word resolve. Not yours, but where yours ends and mine begins. Since then silence, day after day, after day. No explanation, no clue about what He is resolving, what I’m waiting on, or why I need this fortitude if I’m not tackling mountains. Nothing just silence.
Being still before Him and being Content in the wait is not the same. I can be still before Him--I know what to expect. Being content in the wait--Is another story. It’s at this point in time I ask the Question. DO I REALLY TRUST HIM? And with tears running down my face I realize phase 2 is about Trusting Him and Him restoring my ability to trust again.
To Be or Not To Be…Content in the wait. …Trusting Him even in the Silence, …Going deeper in our relationship.
Love Robin
WOW!!!
ReplyDeleteWatching you on this journey, watching God work in you has been one of the most blindingly beautiful things I've ever witnessed. You continue to amaze me in your tenacity and unwavering faith in Abba. Love you friend. Shayne
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